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Showing posts with label dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dating. Show all posts

Laughter: Use It to Pick Up Women

Monday, June 6, 2011

One of the best ways of picking up women is by making them laugh. Here, I supply some such funny stories to start up a conversation.
Humour, some say, is the fruit of life, and this is especially true when it comes to picking up on a girl no matter where the location. Make them laugh, and I guarantee, that you are very close to getting their phone number and even to getting them to go out with you.

But, as we all know, making them laugh, is easier said than done. Precisely for those who find it difficult to come up with something funny to say, I am adding some funny anecdotes and wise cracks that you can memorize and then use in those situations where you need to get the girl in front of you to laugh.

1) The Prescription:
Did you hear of the lady, who walked into the pharmacist and asked for arsenic?
The man behind the counter asked in wonder, "What do you need that for?
The lady calmly replied," to kill my husband."
The pharmacist was taken aback," Are you crazy? Do you want to get us both into jail? And, anyway, why do you want to kill him? Go to a counselor. Get help for your marriage."
The lady paused and from her purse she removed a set of pictures of her husband and the wife of the pharmacist in some very creative postures.
The pharmacist looked at the snaps, put them down and smiled," lady, why did you not tell me that you have a prescription?"

2) The Tip Book
A wife calls out to her husband, "Have you seen the book, 101 Tips to Live for More Than a Hundred Years?
The husband sheepishly replies, "I burnt it."
"What?" the wife shouted out," why?"
The husband whispered back," Because your mother wanted to read it."

3) Range of Food
Looking at his wife fry meat balls in all kinds of shapes and sizes, Tom tapped her on the shoulder, "Why?"
His wife turned," Because you asked for a variety of food."

4) Mushrooms
Tom was picking mushrooms from the forest floor with his wife, when she picked up one and showed it to Tom," Is this for eating?"
Tom smiled," Yes. As long as you do not cook it."

5) Driving Around
Tom greeted his wife when she returned home," So, my dear, how was your first time driving all alone?"
His wife smiled coyly, "Do you want to hear it from me or read about it in the papers?

6) Drama
A couple are watching a film in their local theater when the wife snuggles close to her husband and points to the screen," Do you think that they will get married in the end?"
The husband sighs," Yes. These movies always have bad endings."

7) The Library
Tom visited the local library, walks up to the librarian and asks, "Do you know where I can find the book, the Supremacy of Men over Women?"
The librarian conducts a short search on the computer and looks up," you will be able to find it in the science fiction."

Conclusion:
While some of these might sound offensive, if you use them well you will be able to display not just a sense of humour, but also that you are exactly the opposite of the stereotype. How? Immediately, after you done, lean over and whisper, But I am not like that, and if you allow me to take you out, you will see that for yourself.
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How to Meet that Special Someone

Friday, May 20, 2011

Most people grow up with the assumption that they will eventually meet someone, fall in love, get married and have a family. But this does not just happen. If this is what you want in life then you are going to have to work to find it.

Chances are unless you are very lucky you will go thru many different relationships before you find your special someone. Finding your sole mate is like gambling. In poker and blackjack you may have to play dozens of hands until you get a winning hand, and it is the same with relationships.

During your life you will probably meet some people who seem like they may be the one, or that they are close, but still have the feeling that something else is missing. My advice is that if you are not happy, because something seems like it is missing, then it usually is not right.

Before I found my special someone, I was in a relationship for over 10 years, and I thought everything was great, until I started to seriously consider getting married. Then I noticed that we had so little in common and in reality wanted so many different things out of life and one day we both realized there was much about each of us that we both wanted from someone, but it was not us that we wanted.

Then one day I decided I had enough of trying to go to clubs and bars to meet people. I was sick and tired of trying to find someone in the time it takes to finish a drink. It always seemed the ladies I would meet were all wrong for me, or they seemed great after talking to them for 5 minutes but they seemed to have no interest in me.

Then one day I had an idea, it was not an original idea but I decided to use the internet to try to find the right person for me. So I proceeded to make a myspace profile. On this page I tried to put the real me and not the funny guy trying to be charming that was looking for love at the bar.

And as I would at the poker rooms I went all in, I poured my heart and sole into this. I wrote what I wanted and wrote down who I truly think I am and not who I want to be, and I was rewarded by 1 email responding to my site.

It was amazing; the response I got was like a dream. Imagine you are sitting in a Las Vegas casino playing poker. You are down to your last few dollars, you go all in and you wind up being dealt a Royal Flush, and suddenly the sky is bluer, the grass is greener, and all your worries seem to just fade away.

At first things were a little awkward for the both of us. We decided to hold of on actually meeting until we got to know each other first. We spent a month just talking everyday on the internet. You can really open up to someone and show them the real you and not have to worry about rejection on the internet, after all you are just a faceless ghost, and if things don’t work out you could be sitting next to her on the bus one day without ever knowing it.

The key to finding happiness is realizing you are going to bust more then you are going to get blackjack, but you must keep trying, trying to remember you only need to find the real thing once.


READ MORE - How to Meet that Special Someone

Russian Girl

Friday, May 7, 2010

Rusian Girl

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